by queenofdreams | Oct 9, 2016 | Hypnosis
This is the first part in what I hope will be a series…it’s intended to be a source of information predominantly for those new to the scene. It’s a work in progress, but hopefully you’re able to find something useful to take away. Please remember this is a subjective piece – it’s based around my experiences and opinions. Any and all feedback is welcomed, as always.
Getting Started:
Taking The First Steps
- So you’re interested in Erotic Hypnosis?
You’ve obviously discovered that this is an area which piques your interest, so congratulations on taking the first steps into developing what can potentially be a very pleasurable and fulfilling interest.
Erotic Hypnosis/HypnoDommes is a small but growing niche. Having spoken with many people, the reasons for their attraction to this fetish are as individual as they are, although there are a few more prevalent themes such as discovering the fetish at a young age. I’ve put together this e-book to help guide you through the process of taking those first steps and laying firm foundations on which you will be able to build some undoubtedly incredible experiences.
Erotic Hypnosis is an as yet relatively unknown niche, but it is growing fast and gaining momentum as people such as yourself become aware of its existence. Despite its relatively small size, however, there is a dazzling array of options on offer, and a variety of interests/fetishes are catered for. Everything from utilising hypnosis to enhance pleasure and deepen submission (erotic hypnosis) to sissification, JOI (jerk-off instructions) and many, many more.
- Defining and exploring your interests.
If you’re completely new to this fetish, I am well aware that it can appear to be somewhat overwhelming – I mean, where do you even start? Sometimes the sheer amount of options can feel paralysing because it’s not always clear where to even begin. The good news is this doesn’t have to be the case. With some sensible planning you should be able to reasonably pin-point at least basic indicators of what you are after. These don’t have to be fixed, and may well change and evolve as you become more comfortable.
There are a variety of hypnotists and hypnoDommes out there, many of whom will have their own specific specialties. It is well worth taking time to explore and sample as you’ll likely discover new topics and styles you never knew existed which excite and arouse you. You’re surrounded by opportunities – embrace them.
- Where to find a suitable hypnotist.
The internet is a big place – if you’re looking for a hypnotist where do you start? Well, there’s different ways you can approach this:
- Google – try typing in difference search terms (e.g. erotic hypnosis, hypnoDomme – get creative!) and explore relevant website results. This is rather time consuming but it does allow you to see the actual websites of various hypnotists so you can get a good feel for their style and approach. They’ll also likely have free/sample recordings so you can hear (and in some cases see if they also have videos) their style and approach.
- Hypnosis Communities – There are a number of hypnosis based communities out there. They can be a brilliant way to meet and engage with like-minded people and also hypnotists. The ones I tend to frequent are Inraptured.net and SleepyWatch but I am sure that there are others.
- WebShops – there are webshops that cater for the hypnosis market – SensualMistress, Clips4Sale and others. Well worth checking out.
- Social Media – Personally I only use Twitter at the moment, but I know other hypnotists are active on other options such as Facebook and Tumblr so it’s definitely worth exploring. It’s a great way to get a better insight into a hypnotists personality – plus you can reach out and ask questions.
- What to look for in a hypnotist.
The answer to this will be a little bit subjective as hypnosis itself is inherently subjective. There is no “one size fits all” skeleton key approach that works for absolutely everyone and no one hypnotist who can confidently hypnotise 100% of people.
Having said that, there are key things you should be looking out for:
- Integrity – you want someone who will not unduly take advantage. For some people part of the excitement is being taken advantage of and that’s great, but there should always be mutually understood limits which are adhered to. Trust me when I say this will make the experience 100% better!
- Are they approachable and do they answer your questions? – Again, this will depend on what it is you’re looking for. If it’s more the Domme aspect then yes, you will find a lot of Dommes requesting tributes before they acknowledge you. I can see why they do it – it weeds out timewasters – personally I am not comfortable with this approach. I’d far rather see a brief free introduction so that mutual trust can be established as long as it’s clear from the outset that if both parties are happy with the arrangement then a tribute will be required to “seal the deal” as it were. Having said all that, it’s not my approach (I never request tributes at any point as a “requirement” for engaging/continuing to engage with me) so it’s entirely possible there’s some aspect I haven’t considered!
Assuming you’re looking for more hypnosis orientated services the tribute requirement shouldn’t be such a big consideration and instead you should be focused on the attitude of the hypnotist. When you ask a question how do they respond? Are they friendly? Do you feel comfortable with them? Your response to their attitude is entirely subjective so don’t be concerned with that. They could respond perfectly pleasantly and in a reasonable way but you just don’t feel that you “connect” with them. That’s fine.
- Do they take your interests into account? – Some hypnotists have their own specialties and won’t divert from them – it’s their way or the highway. Others go the other way and say that they can/will do absolutely anything. Be wary of both. Not saying they’re wrong, but in my experience good hypnotists will have areas they specialise in, areas they have experience in/are comfortable with and areas they don’t deal with at all. You want to find a hypnotist who either has extensive experience in the area/s you’re looking to explore or is open to working with you to achieve your goals, even if this means them admitting that they don’t have a lot of experience in that field. If it’s the latter then obviously it’s your decision as to whether or not to pursue the relationship but a good hypnotist will have a “core” set of skills that they can apply and as long as they’re comfortable with the idea/topic, and have a good deal of general experience then odds are you’re in safe hands.
5. What questions should you be asking?
Okay – so you’ve found a hypnotist whose style resonates with you, but you’re unsure what to do next. I would begin by a dialogue with them – perhaps begin by sending them a short, polite message saying you’ve listened to their recordings and enjoyed them (explaining why). Hypnotists are people, too. They will appreciate you taking the time to thank them and it makes it much easier for both of you, rather than simply launching straight into questions.
Once you’ve established a connection, however, it’s worth respectfully asking if they would mind asking some questions as you are potentially interested in further developing your relationship with them. The questions you ask are up to you, but if you’re not sure I would suggest the following questions/themes:
- What aspects of hypnosis do they enjoy? Obviously you as a subject find it a pleasurable experience, but what are their motives? Asking this not only gives you a better understanding of the reasons why they do what they do (is it for the money, lifestyle, love of hypnosis?) and an insight into their personality, but also lets the hypnotist know you’re thinking about them and their interests rather than just your own.
- What areas do they specialise in? You may be really interested in Sissifcation, but this hypnotist specialises in only FinDomme which doesn’t interest you. If your interests don’t align, it’s better to find out sooner rather than later!
- What services do they offer? Do they simply offer mp3’s, or do they also offer videos, live sessions, customised recordings, in-person sessions, etc? Again, this will let you know if your needs will be satisfied.
The above are simply a few suggestions – it goes without saying that it’s not recommended to bombard a hypnotist with questions, but it is worth carefully thinking through your priorities and shortlisting appropriate questions that will get you the answers you need.
by queenofdreams | Dec 10, 2015 | Hypnosis
Thinking about experiencing a Skype hypnosis session, but still a little unsure? Well, there’s no need…the below video should give you an (albeit brief) introduction to me and my style. If you have any questions, as always, I’d love to hear from you so just drop me an email.
by queenofdreams | Nov 7, 2015 | Hypnosis
Imagine is a short recording at just over 4 minutes long, but it packs one hell of a punch. It hits you hard, drops you deep and is dangerously effective at luring you into a blissful state of trance.
This recording also has the additional benefit of super-charging your imagination, so expect to not only feel deliciously happy and tranced, but also energetically creative. What’s not to love?
Oh – and if you want to really go over the edge, loop this file, or mix it with my other recordings. (Disclaimer: please don’t do this unless you have plenty of free time to enjoy it as you will lose track of time!).
So, have a listen, let me know what you think and allow your imagination to run wild…
If you have enjoyed listening to “Imagine” and want to download a version of your very own, all you have to do is head over to my mp3 store where it is available to download on a ‘pay what you feel it’s worth’ basis (suggested amount is $5 as a simple thank you, which would allow me to go and enjoy a little treat, but it’s up to you).
I would love to hear what you think, so please feel free to share your comments on the recording below.
by queenofdreams | Oct 30, 2015 | Hypnosis
The Importance of Trust in Hypnosis
Trust is a key issue in hypnosis. Taking the time to cultivate a solid relationship with a hypnotist based upon mutual understanding, trust and confidence is worth its weight in gold. Trance is, after all, not a binary state. You’re not either in or out of trance – it’s not that black and white. There are levels…gradients. My own personal view is that for many, the deeper and more profound hypnotic states can (and should) only be accessed by working with a hypnotist who you have built a rapport with, and sense of trust. To be able to surrender yourself that completely, to let go that deeply…that takes confidence.
Think of it like the exercise where you are asked to fall backwards and allow someone to catch you. The experience would be very different if you were expecting a stranger to catch you, than if it were someone you implicitly trusted, wouldn’t it? I’m not even sure if the issue is related necessarily to perceived vulnerability…a lot of people assume that it is, but the reality is you’re often more in control of yourself in trance than out of it – your mind is sharper and more focused…it’s simply your body which is more relaxed. I feel that the assumption that allowing someone to hypnotise you is borne of the misconception that you are “controlled” by the hypnotist. Whilst you most certainly can be controlled by a hypnotist, you first have to consciously choose to give them that power over you. You have to have control in the first place to be able to surrender it. I do think the assumption of potential vulnerability plays a part, but to my mind the main issue at play, and the reason why you need a hypnotist you trust is because you want someone there who you trust to be able to support you.
You are already capable of trancing naturally – it’s an inherent skill you already possess. But the journey in to trance can be an unfamiliar one if you are not used to it and it is the hypnotist’s job to act as your guide – to teach you how to recognise the signposts your mind and body offers up to let you know that you are on the right path and to keep going (breathing slowing, mind clearing, etc).
You want to know that the person guiding you has your best interests at heart, that you’re working toward a common goal and that they are there to help and support you if you run into anything untoward. Hypnosis is totally safe but it can be an incredibly profound experience and for some people that can be overwhelming at first, especially if you are new to it. Having someone there to help ground you and reassure you, as well as to help you discover and explore new facts of trance…that can be an incredible experience.
Being able to trust the person hypnotising you, knowing that they won’t lead you astray or attempt to lead you into territory that you are unfamiliar with – that counts for a lot. So – how do you build trust? It takes time. Do your research – read all you can about the hypnotists you’re interested in. Check out their websites, listen to free recordings (with caution) so that you can get a sense of their style and their strengths and whether you feel they work for you. Once you’ve narrowed down the list, talk to them. Any good hypnotherapist worth their salt will be happy to answer any questions you have, so ask as many as you need to put your mind at ease. Building trust is a process it’s not something to be rushed into, but it is well worth the investment.
As well as trusting the hypnotist, however, you also have to trust yourself and recognise that the status quo is that you are in control. No one can take control away from you without your consent, even in trance. As I said before, you have to have control to be able to submit it to someone else (if you choose to – it’s not a necessity for being able to enjoy trance). That’s why I have recorded “The Art of Control” to share with you. It’s a recording designed to remind you that until you decide otherwise, you are in control. I hope you enjoy it and find it useful and I would love to hear your feedback.
by queenofdreams | Oct 23, 2015 | Hypnosis
Millions of people around the world have enjoyed experiencing hypnotic trance. The interesting thing (and the part that makes it so hard to quantify) is that by its very nature, the experience is subjective. The way you experience trance may be different to the way that those other millions of people have experienced trance, purely by virtue of the fact that it is a subjective experience.
I appreciate that thinking about the meaning and potential implications surrounding subjective experiences as opposed to objective experiences can at times appear to be overly complicated, but as a lover of philosophy I have spent many hours mulling over just what it means. After all, subjectivity is defined as the opposite of objectivity, is it not? Well, what if I told you that the term “objective” originally meant “in the mind”? After all, the object of one’s hopes, fears, desires, etc, lie in the mind rather than reality, don’t they? Nowadays, however, use of the term “objective” usually refers to facts relating to the physical, material world and “subjectivity” refers to perceptions “in the mind of the subject”. A subject is the thinker of thoughts, the haver of experiences, if you will.
You can then break down truth’s in to both objective and subjective (for those who are avid lovers of philosophy, I recommend delving into the works of Locke, Descartes and Galileo among others for more in-depth information on this subject). Objective truths are defined as external – those truths that exist regardless of whether there is any conscious mind around to perceive them. For example, the world existed for millions of years before its existence was consciously appreciated. Objective truths exist and are true irrespective of what is considered by any subject who is thinking about the truth.
Just to complicate matters, however, philosophers have identified a second category…that there are truths relating to particular phenomena which in some way require perception and depend on subjects being able to perceive and think about the things which these truths are about. Some truths have both objective and subjective (more formally known as primary and secondary) qualities. Objective/primary qualities could refer to the size or shape of a particular object – these would exist regardless of whether there was a conscious mind to observe/think about them. Subjective/secondary qualities such as colours, smells, tastes, etc would not exist if our conscious minds were not there to experience them.
How does this relate to hypnotic trance? Well, as trance is a subjective state you can only truly know that it exists once you have experienced it for yourself. This doesn’t mean that the phenomena doesn’t exist until you have experienced it – it simply means that you cannot be sure of its existence (in the same way you would be able to with an objective truth, which is obvious for all to see) until you have personally experienced it. In other words the only way you can know trance is to consciously experience it yourself.
Frank Jackson, an Australian philosopher designed a “knowledge argument” which illustrates the idea well. It presupposes the existence of a woman called Mary, who understands all the physical facts – including those relating to the neural basis of human colour vision – without ever having seen the colour red. If Mary saw the colour red, then she couldn’t help but be surprised because it is only at this point that she can actually learn to see the colour red. Since she already knew all about all the physical facts before understanding what it is like to see the colour red, this must mean that knowing what it is like to see it must be knowing something that is non-physical. If we translate this to hypnosis, you can read all you want about hypnosis, the theories and techniques, however you won’t truly know what trance feels like until you actually experience it for yourself.
Exploring this field further, you can dive down the rabbit hole into neurophilosophy of consciousness and what it means to be conscious, but I think I will save that particular mental journey for another day!
My intention with this article was simply to get you thinking…to think about how we know what we know, how can we learn what we know and what are the implications? It’s a brief and condensed introduction intended to allow your mind to embrace abstract thoughts and begin to toy with interesting philosophical questions relating to the journey and experience of hypnosis.
I would love to hear your thoughts.
by queenofdreams | Oct 15, 2015 | Hypnosis
Whilst a lot of people are aware that they can be (potentially) hypnotised by somebody else, there appears to be a more limited awareness around self-hypnosis. With self-hypnosis, you are able to effectively train yourself to achieve trance without the requirement of any external input, however doing so requires a great deal of time and patience as it requires a great deal more practice than standard hypnosis involving a hypnotist.
This article is intended as a brief introduction to the art of self-hypnosis. What it is, how it works and some advice regarding basic steps which you can – with enough practice – use to teach yourself to enjoy and utilise hypnotic trance.
What is self-hypnosis?
Essentially, self hypnosis is a form of hypnosis which is self-induced. In other words, no external influence is required. Instead, self-hypnosis utilises self-suggestion where you, rather than another hypnotist offer yourself suggestions, typically (although not exclusively) relating to self-improvement.
How does self-hypnosis work?
Self hypnosis works in the same way as regular hypnosis, except you are leading the progression without any external guidance or suggestions. As a result, this requires more focus on your part as well as necessitating a prior understanding of how hypnotic trance can be achieved effectively for you.
For this reason, some people find self-hypnosis easier to achieve after they have been guided into hypnosis by a professional hypnotist, as you are then aware of what “markers” to be aware of which confirm that you are going deeper into trance. This isn’t necessary, but it can be helpful in accelerating the process.
How can I practice self-hypnosis?
Below are some simple steps which you can use to help you to practice self hypnosis.
- Have a specific goal in mind. Think of one specific thing which you want to achieve. Keep it relatively simple to begin with, e.g. to be able to deeply relax. Once you have achieved your first goal, then you can begin to add more complex goals, e.g. emptying your mind, then lifting your mood, or overcoming a fear. Anything is possible, but make sure you take your time and don’t run before you can walk. Alternatively, use your initial sessions to focus on specific affirmations and use self-hypnosis to allow those to manifest. e.g. “I am totally capable of achieving what I set my mind to do. I am unique and can achieve things which no one else can, and look forward to showing the rest of the world what I am capable of”.
- Self-awareness is key. What do you notice now about your body that you didn’t when your eyes were open. Do you notice your breathing and how as your mind and body begin to relax your breathing begins to slow down? Do you notice areas of your body which seem particularly tense? Personally, I tend to carry a great deal of tension in my shoulders, so a great exercise for me is to close my eyes and focus on this area of tension as I breathe in, and simply allow myself to be aware of that tension beginning to release itself and melt away as I breathe out. It’s a process, but one that works very well. Alternatively, you can use each breath to focus on a different part of your body – either start at your head or your feet and systematically work your way up or down your body, drawing out all the tension. As well as releasing the physical tension, you’ll also find that your mind becomes much calmer and clearer, as well.
- Prepare yourself. Find somewhere where you can rest in a comfortable position (sitting, lying down – it doesn’t matter) for a prolonged period, and where you will not be disturbed. This means no phones, computers or interruptions….just somewhere where you can relax for at least an hour. Ensure that you’re wearing comfortable clothing – preferably fairly loose – and that you won’t get too hot or too cold. Finally, don’t settle down for a session when you have to rush off right afterwards to a meeting/event, etc. Set aside time when you have nothing else planned afterwards, otherwise you’ll be worrying about how much time you have left instead of simply enjoying the experience.
- Take time and appreciate what you’ve achieved
- Discover your special space.
- Focus on what you want to achieve
- Slowly reorient yourself with your surroundings once you’ve finished – take your time and don’t rush. You’ll likely enjoy a positive “buzz” for a while afterwards, so enjoy it.
