Why Stage Hypnosis Is Like Porn

We’ve all seen those stage hypnosis shows where people seem to be tranced instantly and deeply with just a single word and made to do all sorts of weird and wonderful things. Looks impressive, doesn’t it?

Of course, what they don’t tell you is that the subjects are either faking it or have been carefully selected by the hypnotist because they are naturally highly susceptible to suggestion. Stage hypnosis is like the porn of the hypnosis world – showy and overhyped. Yes it *could* happen in normal day to day life but the odds are astronomical. hypnosis can be “real” but that doesn’t necessarily make it realistic.

Full disclosure – I am not a big fan of stage hypnosis (I know, surprising, right? Haha). I find it’s often exploitative and the potential lack of consent makes me uncomfortable (for those rare somnambulists who are exceptionally susceptible to trance they may not be able to consciously consent to the request to go up on stage, for example).

Stage hypnosis, like porn, has its place. It’s showy and entertaining. It can be exciting to watch, sure, but it can also give unrealistic expectations of what to expect, which can be very unhelpful when trying to achieve your goal.

Just as there are arguments to be made that porn leaves open the door for unrealistic expectations of how men and women should behave and what sex should look/feel like, stage hypnosis does the same. It makes it look as if everyone should be able to trance instantly, that hypnosis is big and showy and dramatic.

More negatively, it can also scare people. They may be worried that they would/could be made to embarrass themselves and/or be forced to do something that they are not comfortable with. This is not true, but if you don’t understand hypnosis and how it works and stage hypnosis is your only experience then it is easy for incorrect inferences to be made.

To use a porn parallel, I’ve heard it said that porn gives women an unrealistic expectation of how quickly a plumber will attend a call out and come to their house. Likewise if watching porn is your only experience of sex you’re going to have a pretty warped view of how things should play out.

Porn and stage hypnosis are entertainment. They can be fun and enjoyable but they don’t accurately reflect the depth of potential and possibilities that exist, nor the richness of the actual reality.

If not appreciated for the entertainment they are then both can also lead to unrealistic expectations which can have negative impacts and knock-on effects.

Having said all that, this doesn’t mean that what you see in stage hypnosis isn’t achievable. Given time and a hypnotist you trust many of the triggers, etc, you see played out on stage can be recreated and enjoyed. What’s important is to realise that this doesn’t happen instantly. You need to learn to run before you can walk, so enjoy the journey and enjoy the entertainment for what it is.

September Goals

So…this blog post references my personal goals for September (And to some extent beyond) but feel free to take the idea and run with it yourselves – consider what goals you have and how you plan to implement them.

As for me…I’ve been musing over my goals for a few months now. Thinking about what I want to achieve and how I will do it. What the logistics are, what’s realistic, etc.

So – I decided to create a list and here it is:

1. I want to take a trip back to UK for 10 days/2 weeks in either September or early October to catch up with my best friend and my great aunt (who turned 101 a few months ago) and who I am very close to. Flights will cost around $500-$700, plus car rental (another$300-$400) plus potentially Airbnb and spending money.

2. I want to visit friends in the USA. This is more vague location and date wise as I have friends all over but it’s something I want to achieve in next 12 months.

3. Go out with friends to celebrate the fact I have been in Canada for an entire year!!!

4. Make a bigger deal out of my birthday (which is September 8th). For the last decade or so I’ve never really acknowledged or celebrated my birthday in any real way. I would like to change that this year.

5. This one is still only a possibility, but I am considering getting a second cat. Those of you who know me know my cat Moose is a bit of a weirdo (to put it mildly) and is not the meek and mild cat I was told he was by the place I rescued him from. His behaviour is making me think he may benefit from a feline companion so it’s something I am looking into. Adoption costs will be in the $200 range, plus cost of extra food, accessories, money to put away for vets bills.

So yeah…those are the main goals I have, especially the UK trip.

If you feel like supporting me in these endeavours, all contributions either through tributes or Skype, mp3 and/or video , purchases are *much* appreciated.

Musings on maintaining professional boundaries

Full disclosure – this blog post serves no purpose other than me getting my thoughts down regarding what was a rather mixed bag of a week.

It was a busy week, which was great – I love hypnosis and the more opportunities I have to enjoy it the better. But it was also a mixed bag in terms of clients. I had a mix of what is typical for me – really lovely clients, both old and new – but also more than one client who presented challenges. What do I mean by that? They were either rude/abusive or messed me around/wasted my time.

Thankfully such instances are incredibly rare but it did make me realise that I need to take a firmer approach to reiterating that I am a business a I suspect some of the aggressiveness I encountered was from me initially being too nice and letting things slide when I shouldn’t.

I love what I do and I am always happy to answer genuine questions from prospective and actual clients, but for some clients this seems to encourage a blurring of professional boundaries. They will either reach out to me on my site “Just to chat” or get frustrated when I do not respond to questions they have quickly enough.

I reiterate that people like this are in the minority and I still believe many of those are not being deliberately manipulative but as a businesswoman it does get frustrating to have to repeatedly reinforce professional boundaries.

I love hypnosis, I love being able to enjoy sessions with clients. I am friendly and approachable and don’t intend to change that – but me being friendly does not mean you have permission to take advantage of me or my time.

I understand why many Dommes request tributes before interaction. It weeds out timewasters. I don’t ask for tributes simply to talk with me – all I ask is that you respect my time. Be reasonable. I’m happy to answer genuine questions, but please be mindful of my time. Time I am spending answering questions for free is time I could be spending earning money.

I happily give some of my time for answering questions because I enjoy being able to give back to the hypnosis community but it doesn’t mean I am free to chat just for the sake of it, or give you in-depth details you can later use to jerk off to (again, a minority but it does happen!)

Striking a balance between being available and not having people try to take advantage is not easy. If I didn’t love hypnosis as much as I do, I probably would have sought another job a long time ago. But I am here and I remain passionate and committed to what I do.

I’m also aware that I am very lucky that the unpleasant clients I have to deal with are definitely in the minority and most of my clients and those who interact with me do respect my time.

My intention here isn’t to stop people from reaching out to me. I’m here to help. All I ask is that you be respectful of my time.

And to my amazing clients, both from last week and in general – thank you for being so wonderful. Without your support I couldn’t continue doing what I love. You rock!

You don’t need to use confusion inductions to hypnotise analytical subjects

This blog post evolved into a direction that is mainly aimed at helping hypnotists understand why confusion inductions are not always necessary – or indeed appropriate – for trancing analytical subjects, but I hope hypnosis subjects also find the information useful/insightful. If, after reading, you have any questions or thoughts please leave comments below. Thank you!

 

Speak to your average hypnotist about analytical people and you tend to get one or a variety of the following comments: that they’re “bad” or “difficult” subjects and that the only way you can successfully trance them is with the use of confusion inductions.

 

Those comments? They’re all absolute rubbish. Those of you who know me know that I absolutely love working with analytical subjects and years of hypnosis experience has consistently shown me how amazing and capable analytical subjects can be. I have written plenty of blog posts on the subject to date.

 

In my many years (going on for a decade now) of being a hypnotist I also rarely use confusion inductions and yet have successfully hypnotised hundreds (I stopped counting years ago) of analytical subjects. How do I achieve that? Why do I go against the widely held/accepted belief that confusion inductions are the only reliable way to hypnotise analytical subjects?

 

Well, again, to be blunt – because it’s nonsense. Confusion inductions can be useful for trancing analytical people but so can many others. It’s most certainly not the only way to successfully trance analytical subjects. Far from it!

 

So – why don’t I tend to use confusion inductions if they are so popular? The main reason is that analytical people are usually also dealing with varying degrees of anxiety and confusion inductions can be overwhelming and/or uncomfortable in such situations. Of course some subjects will really enjoy confusion inductions but to me they often feel like beating the conscious mind into submission by overwhelming the mind of a subject who, if analytical is likely already prone to overthinking. Sending an overthinking brain into meltdown isn’t the most pleasurable way of inducing trance and as pleasure is a priority for me, I tend to turn to other ways of inducing trance.

 

This brings us to the million dollar question – how exactly do I trance analytical subjects? Unfortunately there is no clear cut simple answer as I tailor every induction to the individual subject but I can offer some general pointers. Firstly, and I cannot emphasize this enough the pre talk is important. I’m generalizing here but for the most part, analytical subjects like structure. They like to know what to expect. And even if it’s not “necessary” it’s good practice in general for all kinds of subjects to prepare them and let them know what will happen as well as dispelling some common myths (e.g. the myth that trance is like sleep to give one example).  If the subject has an idea of what to expect then it helps to keep them focused and their mind is less likely to wander.

 

Secondly, never tell an analytical subject to “relax” and “not think about anything”. That is one of the worst things you can say to an analytical subject. It’s akin to telling someone not to think of a pink elephant. What’s the first thing you think about?

 

Finally, it’s okay if analytical people want to analyse their trance experience. Doing so won’t distract them or hinder the process in any way (assuming of course the hypnotist is competent and used to working with analytical subjects).

 

There are many different types of inductions you can use, and there’s no “one size fits all” approach. The induction is less important than the subject and what they need to enjoy a successful trance. If you go into a session determined to use a particular induction then you’re limiting your success rate (and potentially traumatizing the subject) whereas if you go in with an open mind, speak with your subject/client about what they need (they may not know how to articulate it, but again, a competent, experienced hypnotist will know what questions to ask to get the answers they need) then your success rate potentially skyrockets as you’re tailoring the induction to your client, and not trying to force your client to engage in a particular induction.

 

As I said before, some clients will respond well to confusion inductions and I am not dismissing such inductions out of hand. They remain a potentially fun and useful tools (I use confusion inductions with some of my regular clients for fun because I know how to do so in a more light-hearted way and I also know they trust me). What I am suggesting is that confusion inductions are not a blunt tool that can/should be applied to all analytical subjects. Get creative, have fun with inductions, experiment and learn to tailor your approach as a hypnotist to what your client actually needs, not what you assume they need.

Live Skype Hypnosis Session Price Change

I wanted to advise that as of 1st August 2019 the price of Live Skype Hypnosis Sessions will be changing. The new prices ($USD) are listed below:

1 hour session: $150

1.5 hour session: $222

2 hour session: $300

Amending the prices is not a decision I have taken lightly.

Any sessions booked/paid for from 1st August 2019 onwards will be at the above prices so if you want to book a session at the current prices you need to book/pay for your session/s before 1st August (the sessions themselves can be for after 1st August but they need to be booked and paid for before this date for the existing (soon to be old) prices to be honoured).

If you have any questions, please comment here so I can respond.